Sunday, January 31, 2010

Inaugural Addresses of the Presidents of the United States. 1989, Ronald Reagan!

Inaugural Addresses of the Presidents of the United States. 1989.

Ronald Reagan

First Inaugural Address

Tuesday, January 20, 1981



For the first time, an inauguration ceremony was held on the terrace of the West Front of the Capitol. Chief Justice Warren Burger administered the oath of office to the former broadcaster, screen actor, and Governor of California. In the election of 1980, the Republicans won the White House and a majority in the Senate. On inauguration day, American hostages held by the revolutionary government of Iran were released.



Senator Hatfield, Mr. Chief Justice, Mr. President, Vice President Bush, Vice President Mondale, Senator Baker, Speaker O'Neill, Reverend Moomaw, and my fellow citizens: To a few of us here today, this is a solemn and most momentous occasion; and yet, in the history of our Nation, it is a commonplace occurrence. The orderly transfer of authority as called for in the Constitution routinely takes place as it has for almost two centuries and few of us stop to think how unique we really are. In the eyes of many in the world, this every-4-year ceremony we accept as normal is nothing less than a miracle. 1

Mr. President, I want our fellow citizens to know how much you did to carry on this tradition. By your gracious cooperation in the transition process, you have shown a watching world that we are a united people pledged to maintaining a political system which guarantees individual liberty to a greater degree than any other, and I thank you and your people for all your help in maintaining the continuity which is the bulwark of our Republic. 2

The business of our nation goes forward. These United States are confronted with an economic affliction of great proportions. We suffer from the longest and one of the worst sustained inflations in our national history. It distorts our economic decisions, penalizes thrift, and crushes the struggling young and the fixed-income elderly alike. It threatens to shatter the lives of millions of our people. 3

Idle industries have cast workers into unemployment, causing human misery and personal indignity. Those who do work are denied a fair return for their labor by a tax system which penalizes successful achievement and keeps us from maintaining full productivity. 4

But great as our tax burden is, it has not kept pace with public spending. For decades, we have piled deficit upon deficit, mortgaging our future and our children's future for the temporary convenience of the present. To continue this long trend is to guarantee tremendous social, cultural, political, and economic upheavals. 5

You and I, as individuals, can, by borrowing, live beyond our means, but for only a limited period of time. Why, then, should we think that collectively, as a nation, we are not bound by that same limitation? 6

We must act today in order to preserve tomorrow. And let there be no misunderstanding—we are going to begin to act, beginning today. 7

The economic ills we suffer have come upon us over several decades. They will not go away in days, weeks, or months, but they will go away. They will go away because we, as Americans, have the capacity now, as we have had in the past, to do whatever needs to be done to preserve this last and greatest bastion of freedom. 8

In this present crisis, government is not the solution to our problem. 9

From time to time, we have been tempted to believe that society has become too complex to be managed by self-rule, that government by an elite group is superior to government for, by, and of the people. But if no one among us is capable of governing himself, then who among us has the capacity to govern someone else? All of us together, in and out of government, must bear the burden. The solutions we seek must be equitable, with no one group singled out to pay a higher price. 10

We hear much of special interest groups. Our concern must be for a special interest group that has been too long neglected. It knows no sectional boundaries or ethnic and racial divisions, and it crosses political party lines. It is made up of men and women who raise our food, patrol our streets, man our mines and our factories, teach our children, keep our homes, and heal us when we are sick—professionals, industrialists, shopkeepers, clerks, cabbies, and truckdrivers. They are, in short, "We the people," this breed called Americans. 11

Well, this administration's objective will be a healthy, vigorous, growing economy that provides equal opportunity for all Americans, with no barriers born of bigotry or discrimination. Putting America back to work means putting all Americans back to work. Ending inflation means freeing all Americans from the terror of runaway living costs. All must share in the productive work of this "new beginning" and all must share in the bounty of a revived economy. With the idealism and fair play which are the core of our system and our strength, we can have a strong and prosperous America at peace with itself and the world. 12

So, as we begin, let us take inventory. We are a nation that has a government—not the other way around. And this makes us special among the nations of the Earth. Our Government has no power except that granted it by the people. It is time to check and reverse the growth of government which shows signs of having grown beyond the consent of the governed. 13

It is my intention to curb the size and influence of the Federal establishment and to demand recognition of the distinction between the powers granted to the Federal Government and those reserved to the States or to the people. All of us need to be reminded that the Federal Government did not create the States; the States created the Federal Government. 14

Now, so there will be no misunderstanding, it is not my intention to do away with government. It is, rather, to make it work—work with us, not over us; to stand by our side, not ride on our back. Government can and must provide opportunity, not smother it; foster productivity, not stifle it. 15

If we look to the answer as to why, for so many years, we achieved so much, prospered as no other people on Earth, it was because here, in this land, we unleashed the energy and individual genius of man to a greater extent than has ever been done before. Freedom and the dignity of the individual have been more available and assured here than in any other place on Earth. The price for this freedom at times has been high, but we have never been unwilling to pay that price. 16

It is no coincidence that our present troubles parallel and are proportionate to the intervention and intrusion in our lives that result from unnecessary and excessive growth of government. It is time for us to realize that we are too great a nation to limit ourselves to small dreams. We are not, as some would have us believe, doomed to an inevitable decline. I do not believe in a fate that will fall on us no matter what we do. I do believe in a fate that will fall on us if we do nothing. So, with all the creative energy at our command, let us begin an era of national renewal. Let us renew our determination, our courage, and our strength. And let us renew our faith and our hope. 17

We have every right to dream heroic dreams. Those who say that we are in a time when there are no heroes just don't know where to look. You can see heroes every day going in and out of factory gates. Others, a handful in number, produce enough food to feed all of us and then the world beyond. You meet heroes across a counter—and they are on both sides of that counter. There are entrepreneurs with faith in themselves and faith in an idea who create new jobs, new wealth and opportunity. They are individuals and families whose taxes support the Government and whose voluntary gifts support church, charity, culture, art, and education. Their patriotism is quiet but deep. Their values sustain our national life. 18

I have used the words "they" and "their" in speaking of these heroes. I could say "you" and "your" because I am addressing the heroes of whom I speak—you, the citizens of this blessed land. Your dreams, your hopes, your goals are going to be the dreams, the hopes, and the goals of this administration, so help me God. 19

We shall reflect the compassion that is so much a part of your makeup. How can we love our country and not love our countrymen, and loving them, reach out a hand when they fall, heal them when they are sick, and provide opportunities to make them self-sufficient so they will be equal in fact and not just in theory? 20

Can we solve the problems confronting us? Well, the answer is an unequivocal and emphatic "yes." To paraphrase Winston Churchill, I did not take the oath I have just taken with the intention of presiding over the dissolution of the world's strongest economy. 21

In the days ahead I will propose removing the roadblocks that have slowed our economy and reduced productivity. Steps will be taken aimed at restoring the balance between the various levels of government. Progress may be slow—measured in inches and feet, not miles—but we will progress. Is it time to reawaken this industrial giant, to get government back within its means, and to lighten our punitive tax burden. And these will be our first priorities, and on these principles, there will be no compromise. 22

On the eve of our struggle for independence a man who might have been one of the greatest among the Founding Fathers, Dr. Joseph Warren, President of the Massachusetts Congress, said to his fellow Americans, "Our country is in danger, but not to be despaired of.... On you depend the fortunes of America. You are to decide the important questions upon which rests the happiness and the liberty of millions yet unborn. Act worthy of yourselves." 23

Well, I believe we, the Americans of today, are ready to act worthy of ourselves, ready to do what must be done to ensure happiness and liberty for ourselves, our children and our children's children. 24

And as we renew ourselves here in our own land, we will be seen as having greater strength throughout the world. We will again be the exemplar of freedom and a beacon of hope for those who do not now have freedom. 25

To those neighbors and allies who share our freedom, we will strengthen our historic ties and assure them of our support and firm commitment. We will match loyalty with loyalty. We will strive for mutually beneficial relations. We will not use our friendship to impose on their sovereignty, for our own sovereignty is not for sale. 26

As for the enemies of freedom, those who are potential adversaries, they will be reminded that peace is the highest aspiration of the American people. We will negotiate for it, sacrifice for it; we will not surrender for it—now or ever. 27

Our forbearance should never be misunderstood. Our reluctance for conflict should not be misjudged as a failure of will. When action is required to preserve our national security, we will act. We will maintain sufficient strength to prevail if need be, knowing that if we do so we have the best chance of never having to use that strength. 28

Above all, we must realize that no arsenal, or no weapon in the arsenals of the world, is so formidable as the will and moral courage of free men and women. It is a weapon our adversaries in today's world do not have. It is a weapon that we as Americans do have. Let that be understood by those who practice terrorism and prey upon their neighbors. 29

I am told that tens of thousands of prayer meetings are being held on this day, and for that I am deeply grateful. We are a nation under God, and I believe God intended for us to be free. It would be fitting and good, I think, if on each Inauguration Day in future years it should be declared a day of prayer. 30

This is the first time in history that this ceremony has been held, as you have been told, on this West Front of the Capitol. Standing here, one faces a magnificent vista, opening up on this city's special beauty and history. At the end of this open mall are those shrines to the giants on whose shoulders we stand. 31

Directly in front of me, the monument to a monumental man: George Washington, Father of our country. A man of humility who came to greatness reluctantly. He led America out of revolutionary victory into infant nationhood. Off to one side, the stately memorial to Thomas Jefferson. The Declaration of Independence flames with his eloquence. 32

And then beyond the Reflecting Pool the dignified columns of the Lincoln Memorial. Whoever would understand in his heart the meaning of America will find it in the life of Abraham Lincoln. 33

Beyond those monuments to heroism is the Potomac River, and on the far shore the sloping hills of Arlington National Cemetery with its row on row of simple white markers bearing crosses or Stars of David. They add up to only a tiny fraction of the price that has been paid for our freedom. 34

Each one of those markers is a monument to the kinds of hero I spoke of earlier. Their lives ended in places called Belleau Wood, The Argonne, Omaha Beach, Salerno and halfway around the world on Guadalcanal, Tarawa, Pork Chop Hill, the Chosin Reservoir, and in a hundred rice paddies and jungles of a place called Vietnam. 35

Under one such marker lies a young man—Martin Treptow—who left his job in a small town barber shop in 1917 to go to France with the famed Rainbow Division. There, on the western front, he was killed trying to carry a message between battalions under heavy artillery fire. 36

We are told that on his body was found a diary. On the flyleaf under the heading, "My Pledge," he had written these words: "America must win this war. Therefore, I will work, I will save, I will sacrifice, I will endure, I will fight cheerfully and do my utmost, as if the issue of the whole struggle depended on me alone." 37

The crisis we are facing today does not require of us the kind of sacrifice that Martin Treptow and so many thousands of others were called upon to make. It does require, however, our best effort, and our willingness to believe in ourselves and to believe in our capacity to perform great deeds; to believe that together, with God's help, we can and will resolve the problems which now confront us. 38

And, after all, why shouldn't we believe that? We are Americans. God bless you, and thank you.

Bro Tom's Message today!

Just got out of the Crosspoint Church service.

"Don't let your conscience be your guide" was the Great Message!

Gotta get the full message for you!

Also, gotta go to my Grandson's BDay party on Hwy 359 at 130PM!

We will be late!



Happy Lord's Day, All!

Now that you've jarred the floor, here's your first Hot Cup 'O Joe!

Paper, Word, Prayer for our Nation & our Troups, Police, Fire & EMS Personnel, Church! If you're in Pearland, TX, please accept my invitation to visit Crosspoint Church on Old Alvin Rd @ Knapp! FREE coffee & Donuts!


Rick Perry Info!

I just posted this on Dan Patrick's FB comment page, but want to be sure all Bloggers see this:

I support Rick 100% based upon the following ISSUES!

There is NO populist favoritism involved when you talk strictly about the issues and here they are: ... See More


Texas has consistently been ranked as one of the best places to do business in the nation under Gov. Perry’s leadership.

Aggressive Job Creation.

Record Property Tax Reductions.

Texas is Succeeding with a Strong Economy and Friendly Business Climate.

Read Related Press Releases, Blog Posts and News Articles about Gov. Perry on Economic Development in Texas.


As the national and global economies struggle to recover from their financial woes, Texas is displaying strength that is built on conservative fiscal discipline.

Overcame Budget Shortfall.

Reducing Spending.

Cutting Business Taxes.

Read Related Press Releases, Blog Posts and News Articles about Gov. Perry's Fiscal Conservative Principles.


Folks in Washington should take a closer look at the Tenth Amendment of the U.S. Constitution, which clearly states the preeminence of states’ rights in the structure of our country. The time has come to assert those rights, and remind the federal government that it was created to serve states, not the other way around. Left unchecked, Washington will continue digging our country into a hole of debt, increased government intrusion and the loss of personal liberty.

Out-of-control spending.

Cap and Trade.

Read Related Press Releases, Blog Posts and News Articles about Gov. Perry's Fight against Intrusive Washington Policies.


We cannot have homeland security without border security. Under Gov. Perry, Texas has been a leader on border security while the federal government has faltered. Under his leadership, Texas has put more boots on the ground, more technology to use, and more targeted operations to dramatically reduce all crime along the border.

Surge Operations.

Transnational Gang Initiative.

Ranger Recon.

Read Related Press Releases, Blog Posts and News Articles about Gov. Perry's Efforts on Border Security.


Under Gov. Perry’s leadership, more students than ever before have enrolled and graduated from college. Texas has increased educational accountability and raised standards to help students succeed in college while increasing teacher pay.

Increased Enrollment.

College Prep Mandatory in High School.

High Ranking.

Teacher Pay Raises and Incentives.

Public-Private Venture.

Road to Tier One.

Affordable College.

Read Related Press Releases, Blog Posts and News Articles about Gov. Perry's Efforts on Public and Higher Education.


Under Gov. Perry, Texas has reformed its child protective services, insured more of Texas’ needy children than ever before, and increased health care investments by more than $20 billion while promoting prevention and wellness programs to cut down on future health care costs. Gov. Perry has also led the most sweeping lawsuit reform in the nation, cracking down on junk asbestos claims and frivolous medical malpractice lawsuits. Now thousands more doctors, including specialists, are practicing in Texas, bringing greater access to quality health care for Texans.

Cracking Down on Frivolous Lawsuits.

Increased access in underserved areas.

Protecting Children.

Texas Protects its Most Vulnerable Citizens.

Tough on Fraud.

Read Related Press Releases, Blog Posts and News Articles about Gov. Perry's Efforts on Health Care and Tort Reform.


Under Gov. Perry, Texas is moving aggressively to create a diverse portfolio of energy sources, including renewable, natural gas, coal and nuclear power to meet the needs of our growing population in an eco-sensitive manner. Texas is a national leader in reducing emissions and known pollutants and advancing renewable energy sources. Texas has done so while balancing the need for environmental improvements with fostering economic growth, new investment and job creation.

Renewable Energy.

The Texas Emissions Reduction Plan.

Read Related Press Releases, Blog Posts and News Articles about Gov. Perry's Efforts on the Environment and Natural Resources.


Gov. Perry is the most pro-life governor Texas has ever had and has implemented a number of significant reforms to protect life and strengthen Texas families across our state.


Banning Embryonic Stem Cell Research

Protecting Traditional Marriage

Promoting Adoption

Read Related Press Releases, Blog Posts and News Articles about Gov. Perry's Record as a Social Conservative.


Gov. Perry pioneered innovative infrastructure solutions for a rapidly growing state by promoting private investment. Transportation infrastructure is critical to the economy and quality of life of Texans. Under Gov. Perry, Texas has made dramatic strides to improve roads, railroads, airports, seaports and mass transit, ensuring Texans and the economy can keep moving forward.

Local Control

Ending Budget Diversions

Help For New Roads

Read Related Press Releases, Blog Posts and News Articles about Gov. Perry's Record on Transportation.


Gov. Perry supports appropriate, just punishment as a strong deterrent to criminal behavior. Texas has strong laws that protect the innocent and ensure convicted murders serve their time.

Life without Parole Option

Jessica’s Law

Protecting People against Drunk Drivers

Read Related Press Releases, Blog Posts and News Articles about Gov. Perry's Record on Criminal Justice.


More than 90 percent of the land in Texas is privately owned and Gov. Perry is committed to protecting Texans’ rights as landowners. Gov. Perry worked to protect private property rights by responding quickly to the U.S. Supreme Court Kelo decision by prohibiting the use of eminent domain and the condemnation of private property for economic development purposes.

Working with the legislature, Gov. Perry helped pass the strongest property rights protection in the state’s history through House Joint Resolution (HJR) 14. Gov. Perry campaigned for this measure, which voters enshrined in the Constitution by approving Proposition 11, so the legislature can’t weaken it without the people giving their permission at the ballot box. When voters added Proposition 11 to the Constitution this November, they forever prevented the government from taking private property to give a developer or enhance tax revenues.

Finally: Why try and fix something that's NOT BROKEN?

Rick is a PROVEN COMMODITY, just like you are!

I say: Keep him in office and keep Texas #1!

Bob Lewis


Friday, January 29, 2010

January 29, 2010

This will be the first ACTUAL Bob's Notes!  It will be short!  Please bookmark me, if you would.

Everything else has basically been clipping & posting other people's Stuff!

Anyways, its FRIDAY!  Happy Friday to all of you!  Hope you have a Great weekend ahead!

Thank You Lord for keeping the rain away from the Houston/Pearland areas last weekend, please keep it away this weekend and every weekend this year, in His name.

Lord, please Watch Over, Bless, Protest and Heal my entire Prayer List, my family, myself, all Christians around the world and all US Troops around the world and all US Police, Fire & EMS Personnel today and everyday this year, in His Name.

Lord, please be with all Christian Pastors, Sunday School Teachers, Missionaries and Gideons around the world this weekend as they present their messages on how Christ died on the Cross for our sins so we could go to Heaven, in His Name.

For the success of Scott Brown in Massachusetts.  Please let it be a "wake-up" call to the Leaders of our Great Nation that we are NOT headed in the right direction.

~Bob Lewis~

Bob Lewis



Top Ten Cities - Poverty

Top Ten Cities - Poverty

City, State, % of People Below the Poverty Level

1. Detroit , MI 32.5%

2. Buffalo , NY 29.9%

3. Cincinnati , OH 27.8%

4. Cleveland , OH 27.0%

5. Miami , FL 26.9%

5. St. Louis , MO 26.8%

7. El Paso , TX 26.4%

8. Milwaukee , WI 26.2%

9. Philadelphia , PA 25.1%

10. Newark , NJ 24.2%

U.S. Census Bureau, 2006 American Community Survey, August 2007

What do the top ten cities (over 250,000) with the highest poverty rate all have in common?

Detroit , MI (1st on the poverty rate list) hasn't elected a Republican mayor since 1961;

Buffalo , NY (2nd) hasn't elected one since 1954;

Cincinnati , OH (3rd)...since 1984;

Cleveland , OH (4th)....since 1989;

Miami , FL (5th) has never had a Republican mayor;

St. Louis , MO (6th)....since 1949;

El Paso , TX (7th) has never had a Republican mayor;

Milwaukee , WI (8th)...since 1908;

Philadelphia , PA (9th)...since 1952;

Newark , NJ (10th)....since 1907.

Einstein once said, 'The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.'

It is the poor who habitually elect Democrats---yet they are still


Thursday, January 28, 2010

Fawn & Kitten

Vietnam Virtual Wall

Just copy, paste and click on this link to observe, study, research the ENTIRE Vietnam Virtual Wall:

Sgt Munley Update! Please Pray for her continued recovery!

It's been a long time since my last posting. I hope this finds everyone in good spirits and recovered from the holidays.

Well, I had a total knee replacement surgery on Jan 14th, 2010. I came in about 9am to the (Hospital). Instantly, they took me and my family into a private room. They stated that the media has been calling especially that morning. They wanted to put me in as a confidential patient so that I won't be getting visitors and phone calls. I'm glad now that I chose that route because I've been in pretty bad shape before today and not up to talking or seeing anyone.

After deciding to go confidential, they took me in the back and told me to change into the famous hospital robe and hospital socks. They did put fresh warm blankets on me so that was good. They started taking lots of information down. Three to four nurses were asking me different questions at once. Because of their personalities and smiles, it wasn't overwhelming at all. After an IV was started, they explained to my parents that it would take a couple hours for the surgery and then I would be in recovery for another hour or so until I woke up and was aware of everything. They put some good cocktail in my IV and the next thing I know, I was in "lala land"!

I woke up and had a nurse who was super cool with me. He instantly started making me laugh and smile. He thanked me for something NOT so obvious. One would think it would have to do with the shooting, but it surely wasn't. He said "Thank you" for getting a foot pedicure before surgery. He said I would be surprised of how many people with ugly, funky feet come in and they have to stare at them the whole time, haha!!!

So I was pretty drugged up still in recovery and not able to feel much of anything because of the local they put in my knee itself. I thought to myself, "if this is all the pain i'll feel, then it's not so bad". Little did I know that in a few hours, I would be having some serious pain problems. They had me on the morphine drip but my body was already tolerant to the morphine so it was like I was getting no pain relief at all. Surgery was on a Thursday and the Pain Management Doc didn't come to see me until friday night around 10pm. He started me on a whole bunch of meds but they didn't start really affected me until Saturday. Then it felt as if I was over-medicated. Friday night was terrible having to deal with the pain and Friday, I was almost in a coma b/c of the meds so things didn't start getting better until Sunday.

Sunday was a much better day. It was nice and quiet and the pain was somewhat manageable. Monday rolled around and I thought I would be leaving soon but the Doc said he wanted to keep me an extra day. He explained to me that he didn't have to put in a hinge knee, that he put in moderate knee and it tends to have a longer lifespan. So that was good news!!! So here is Tuesday, the pain is really under control. I'm walking around on the walker a WHOLE lot more!!! My range of motion is not good though. I am suppose to be past 90 percent before leaving the hospital and I have only reached 67 on yesterday evening. My leg got locked into a bent position before from the scar tissue and that's the big worry this go around. I really thought this was going to be a surgery that would be easy to handle. Come to find out, it is extremely challenging! They tell you to work with your physical therapist and do all of what they say. But my leg won't do what they say. Not that it hurts at all it's just like there is lack of communication between my brain and my leg muscles. So that's the only issue I have. I'll be glad when I get home tomorrow. Life has been a little stressful lately but it's always better to be stressed out at home than somewhere else.

Hope everyone has a blessed week. Love you all!

Colonoscopy Journal!!!

I called my friend Andy Sable, a gastroenterologist, to make an appointment for a colonoscopy.

A few days later, in his office, Andy showed me a color diagram of the colon, a lengthy organ that appears to go all over the place, at one point passing briefly through Minneapolis.

Then Andy explained the colonoscopy procedure to me in a thorough, reassuring and patient manner.

I nodded thoughtfully, but I didn't really hear anything he said, because my brain was shrieking, 'HE'S GOING TO STICK A TUBE 17,000 FEET UP YOUR BEHIND!'

I left Andy's office with some written instructions, and a prescription for a product called 'MoviPrep,' which comes in a box large enough to hold a microwave oven. I will discuss MoviPrep in detail later; for now suffice it to say that we must never allow it to fall into the hands of America 's enemies.

I spent the next several days productively sitting around being nervous.

Then, on the day before my colonoscopy, I began my preparation. In accordance with my instructions, I didn't eat any solid food that day; all I had was chicken broth, which is basically water, only with less flavor.

Then, in the evening, I took the MoviPrep.. You mix two packets of powder together in a one-liter plastic jug, then you fill it with lukewarm water. (For those unfamiliar with the metric system, a liter is about 32 gallons). Then you have to drink the whole jug. This takes about an hour, because MoviPrep tastes - and here I am being kind - like a mixture of goat spit and urinal cleanser, with just a hint of lemon.

The instructions for MoviPrep, clearly written by somebody with a great sense of humor, state that after you drink it, 'a loose, watery bowel movement may result.'

This is kind of like saying that after you jump off your roof, you may experience contact with the ground.

MoviPrep is a nuclear laxative. I don't want to be too graphic, here, but, have you ever seen a space-shuttle launch? This is pretty much the MoviPrep experience, with you as the shuttle. There are times when you wish the commode had a seat belt. You spend several hours pretty much confined to the bathroom, spurting violently. You eliminate everything. And then, when you figure you must be totally empty, you have to drink another liter of MoviPrep, at which point, as far as I can tell, your bowels travel into the future and start eliminating food that you have not even eaten yet.

After an action-packed evening, I finally got to sleep.

The next morning my wife drove me to the clinic I was very nervous. Not only was I worried about the procedure, but I had been experiencing occasional return bouts of MoviPrep spurtage. I was thinking, 'What if I spurt on Andy?' How do you apologize to a friend for something like that? Flowers would not be enough.

At the clinic I had to sign many forms acknowledging that I understood and totally agreed with whatever the heck the forms said. Then they led me to a room full of other colonoscopy people, where I went inside a little curtained space and took off my clothes and put on one of those hospital garments designed by sadist perverts, the kind that, when you put it on, makes you feel even more naked than when you are actually naked..

Then a nurse named Eddie put a little needle in a vein in my left hand. Ordinarily I would have fainted, but Eddie was very good, and I was already lying down. Eddie also told me that some people put vodka in their MoviPrep..

At first I was ticked off that I hadn't thought of this, but then I pondered what would happen if you got yourself too tipsy to make it to the bathroom, so you were staggering around in full Fire Hose Mode. You would have no choice but to burn your house.

When everything was ready, Eddie wheeled me into the procedure room, where Andy was waiting with a nurse and an anesthesiologist. I did not see the 17,000-foot tube, but I knew Andy had it hidden around there somewhere. I was seriously nervous at this point.

Andy had me roll over on my left side, and the anesthesiologist began hooking something up to the needle in my hand.

There was music playing in the room, and I realized that the song was 'Dancing Queen' by ABBA. I remarked to Andy that, of all the songs that could be playing during this particular procedure, 'Dancing Queen' had to be the least appropriate.

'You want me to turn it up?' said Andy, from somewhere behind me..

'Ha ha,' I said. And then it was time, the moment I had been dreading for more than a decade. If you are squeamish, prepare yourself, because I am going to tell you, in explicit detail, exactly what it was like.

I have no idea. Really. I slept through it. One moment, ABBA was yelling 'Dancing Queen, feel the beat of the tambourine,' and the next moment, I was back in the other room, waking up in a very mellow mood.

Andy was looking down at me and asking me how I felt. I felt excellent. I felt even more excellent when Andy told me that It was all over, and that my colon had passed with flying colors. I have never been prouder of an internal organ.

On the subject of Colonoscopies....

Colonoscopies are no joke, but these comments during the exam were quite humorous..... A physician claimed that the following are actual comments made by his patients (predominately male) while he was performing their colonoscopies:

1. 'Take it easy, Doc. You're boldly going where no man has gone before!'

2. 'Find Amelia Earhart yet?'

3. 'Can you hear me NOW?'

4. 'Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?'

5. 'You know, in Arkansas , we're now legally married.'

6. 'Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?'

7. 'You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out...'

8. 'Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!'

9. 'If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit!'

10. 'Hey Doc, let me know if you find my dignity.'

11. 'You used to be an executive at Enron, didn't you?'

12. 'God, now I know why I am not gay.'

And the best one of all:

13. 'Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up there?'


Dave Barry is a Pulitzer Prize-winning humor columnist for the Miami Herald.

Is Brit Hume “Too Christian” for TV?

Is Brit Hume “Too Christian” for TV?

January 22, 2010 by Chip Wood

Holy mackerel, what a tempest in a teapot Fox News commentator Brit Hume unleashed when he made a pro-Christian comment on national TV. Judging by the hysterical outcry from the left, you would think he had publicly advocated devil-worship.

Come to think of it, had Hume instead advocated giving Satan a chance I’m sure the reaction would have been far friendlier. He would have been hailed for his open-mindedness and applauded for being so non-judgmental.

In case you missed the beginning of this controversy, here’s how it started: Appearing on a panel on Fox News Sunday, Hume was asked what advice he would give the embattled Tiger Woods, in an effort to end the controversy that has besmirched the reputation (and flattened the bank account) of the superstar golfer.

Hume began by saying that, while Tiger’s golf game would eventually recover, if he wanted to overcome the guilt and shame of his repeated infidelities he should turn from Buddhism to Christianity.

Hume then observed, “The extent to which he can recover, it seems to me, depends on his faith. He is said to be a Buddhist. I don’t think that faith offers the kind of forgiveness and redemption that is offered by the Christian faith. So, my message to Tiger would be, ‘Tiger, turn to the Christian faith and you can make a total recovery and be a great example to the world.’”

Needless to say, the loony left went absolutely ballistic over Hume’s pro-Christian comments. Keith Olbermann, MSNBC’s bile-filled poster boy for intolerance, berated Hume for trying to “threaten Tiger Woods into becoming a Christian.”

Really? I hope someone asks Olbermann by what stretch of imagination he could find a threat in Hume’s remarks. They sounded very conciliatory to me… perhaps even overly optimistic in the promise of “total recovery.”

But Olbermann wasn’t finished. He went on to compare Fox News to Islamic extremists, for allowing Hume to promote Christianity on national TV. He then invited Dan Savage, a homosexual extremist, on his show. Savage promptly lambasted Hume as a “lunatic” for his remarks. Olbermann nodded approvingly.

Jon Stewart, the smirking liberal who hosts The Daily Show, played clips of Hume’s comments to the amusement of his audience.

Tom Shales, the TV critic at The Washington Post, mocked the idea that Christians should “run around trying to drum up new business.” What Hume did was outrageous, Shales insisted—unless you were so backward as to believe that “every Christian by mandate must proselytize.”

Actually, as you no doubt know, many Christians believe exactly that. But I doubt if my more evangelical friends would give Brit Hume high marks for calling Tiger (or anyone else) to account. What he said was a long, long way from an altar call. But the blogosphere responded as though Hume’s remarks were the most glaring example of bigotry, bias and downright stupidity ever uttered outside The Jerry Springer Show.

David Shuster, Olbermann’s colleague on MSNBC, lambasted Hume for violating “the separation of church and television.” I think he confused that principle with another one that’s just as phony—the so-called “separation of church and state,” which is also nowhere in the Constitution.

One of the strangest criticisms of all came from Dan Savage, the homosexual activist I mentioned above. He roared indignantly that Hume was claiming Christianity “offers the best deal—it gives you the get-out-of-adultery free card that other religions just can’t.”

Excuse me, but isn’t that exactly what Christianity promises? As Ann Coulter put it, “God sent his only Son to get the crap beaten out of him, die for our sins and rise from the dead. If you believe that, you’re in. Your sins are washed away from you—sins even worse than adultery!—because of the cross.”

And then the acerbic columnist and commentator added the following: “Surely you remember the cross, liberals—the symbol banned by ACLU lawsuits from public property throughout the land?”

To my surprise, I found one of the most reasonable comments about the whole affair in a column in The New York Times, when Ross Douthat wrote, “This doesn’t mean that we need to welcome real bigotry into our public discourse. But what Hume said wasn’t bigoted: Indeed, his claim about the difference between Buddhism and Christianity was perfectly defensible. Christians believe in a personal God who forgives sin. Buddhists, as a rule, do not. And it’s at least plausible that Tiger Woods might welcome the possibility that there’s someone out there capable of forgiving him, even if Elin Nordegren and his corporate sponsors do not.”

Yes, as many observers have noted, Christianity is the best deal in the universe. There is no other faith of which I’m aware that promises your sins will be forgiven.

Of course to the intellectual elite, there is no such thing as “sin.” We are supposed to tolerate anything and everything, from serial infidelities to the most blatant perversions.

In the land of the free and the home of the brave, no one can be persecuted for his or her beliefs anymore. Unless, of course, they are so old-fashioned and intolerant as to believe that sin exists… that sinners will be punished… and that redemption can only be found at the foot of the Cross.

Brit, I’m sure glad you no longer get your paycheck from one of our so-called “fair-minded” networks. Because if you did, I have no doubt they’d require you to grovel an abject apology—right before they threw you out the door.

Until next time, keep some powder dry.

—Chip Wood

Peace, Love & Happiness

Peace, Love & Happiness

Jim Neugent

A Coach In Childress , Texas

Writes To ABC Network

Jim Writes:

My name is Jim Neugent. I wrote to ABC (on-line) concerning a program called 'THE PRACTICE.' In last nights episode, one of the lawyer's mothers decided she is gay and wanted her son to go to court and help her get a marriage license so she could marry her 'partner.' I sent the following letter to ABC yesterday and really did not expect a reply, but I did get one.

My original message was:

ABC is obsessed with the subject of homosexuality. I will no longer watch any of your attempts to convince the world that homosexuality is OK. ' THE PRACTICE' can be a fairly good show, but last night's program was so typical of your agenda. You picked the 'dufus' of the office to be the one who was against the idea of his mother being gay, and made him look like a whiner because he had convictions. This type of mentality calls people like me a 'gay basher.'

Read the first chapter of Romans (that's in the Bible); and see what the apostle Paul had to say about it..... He, God and Jesus were all 'gay bashers'. What if she'd fallen in love with her cocker spaniel? Is that an alternative life style? (By the way, the Bible speaks against that, too.)

--Jim Neugent

Here is ABC's reply from the ABC on-line webmaster:

How about getting your nose out of the Bible (which is ONLY a book of stories compiled by MANY different writers hundreds of years ago) and read the declaration of independence (what our nation is built on), where it says 'All Men are Created equal,' and try treating them that way for a change!

Or better yet, try thinking for yourself and stop using an archaic book of stories as your lame crutch for your existence. You are in the minority in this country, and your boycott will not affect us at ABC or our freedom of statement.

Jim Neugent's second response to ABC:

Thanks for your reply. From your harsh reply, evidently I hit a nerve. I will share it with all with whom I come in contact. Hopefully, the Arkansas Democrat Newspaper will include it in one of their columns and I will be praying for you.

- -Jim Neugent- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Note: Wouldn't Satan just love it if people stopped using the Bible for a crutch?

Please resend this to everyone in your mailbox.

Jim Neugent

I wonder if the person from ABC considered how many people would eventually read this!

Please, if you are a Christian, pass this on to others so they may be aware.




1.. "Those who hammer their guns into plows will plow for those who do not." ~Thomas Jefferson

2. "Those who trade liberty for security have neither." ~ John Adams

3. Free men do not ask permission to bear arms.

4. An armed man is a citizen. An unarmed man is a subject.

5. Only a government that is afraid of its citizens tries to control them.

6. Gun control is not about guns; it's about control.

7. You only have the rights you are willing to fight for.

8. Know guns, know peace, know safety. No guns, no peace, no safety.

9. You don't shoot to kill; you shoot to stay alive.

10. Assault is a behavior, not a device.

11. 64,999,987 firearms owners killed no one yesterday.

12. The United States Constitution (c) 1791. All Rights Reserved.

13. The Second Amendment is in place in case the politicians ignore the others.

14. What part of 'shall not be infringed' do you NOT understand?

15. Guns have only two enemies; rust and politicians.

16. When you remove the people's right to bear arms, you create slaves.

17. The American Revolution would never have happened with gun control.



'NAM '68


A Wise Man once said...

You cannot help the poor by destroying the rich.

You cannot strengthen the weak by weakening the strong.

You cannot bring about prosperity by discouraging thrift.

You cannot lift the wage earner up by pulling the wage payer down.

You cannot further the brotherhood of man by inciting class hatred.

You cannot build character and courage by taking away people's initiative and independence.

You cannot help people permanently by doing for them, what they could and should do for themselves.........Abraham Lincoln


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Pearland, TX, United States
I am a Devout Christian, a Staunch Republican and happily married man (35-years) with 6 grown children and 8 grandchildren. I am in the process of developing 2 High-Rise Condos and a 4-story Retail/Professional Building in Pearland, TX, I am a Commercial Real Estate Specialist there. My links are: IN GOD WE TRUST!!